A First...and an apology (kinda)

Today I have to admit, I had a little meltdown. After I ate supper, I came downstairs to a song playing on the radio that makes me cry every single time I hear it. Usually just a sniffle and I'm good, but tonight I bawled.
Wondering what the "first" is yet? I cried about a boy. I, Lisa Keough, aged 22 have never ever cried over a boy. Until tonight. But, I didn't cry because he broke my heart, or didn't want to date me. I cried because my friend is hurting and I felt powerless.
The last boy I knew who hurt was sweet Jaydee. He tripped and scraped his arm. With Jaydee though , all it took was a cuddle and a kiss and he was all better. The boy I cried for today hurts inside and I don't think I can kiss and cuddle it better. And I'd just recently been kind of rude to this boy because he made me angry. I sent him an angry Facebook message (oh I know. 'oooh how scary!') and when I seen him the other night I ignored him, even though I could see that he stopped and waved at me. (Sorry :[ ) Now what I was angry at him for seems silly. It was foolish really. The reason now doesn't matter.. all that matters is I'm awful sorry. Sorry for being selfish and sorry for being just plain stupid. And sorry for your hurt. I wish I could make it  better for you. I love you.

thats all for tonight folks.
xo Lisa

Blind Date (Part 2!)

So you may all be wondering about how my date(s) went yesterday.. and you may not be ;) but I'm going to tell you anyway! hahaha

My "blind date" went well ( I think??) I had a good time anyway! haha I met him at his grandma's for tea and then it was suggested that he show me the barns because I like cows. So we went to the barns lol and he introduced me to the cows. After the tour and the introductions haha he took me back to his grandmothers and invited me to come back up again for a bit to see how the milking works (he works on a dairy..) but unfortunately I had to leave. I thought him cute, and he seemed very nice but I didn't know what he thought of me (I didn't ask.. lol) but I found out today he asked about me last night when my Pastors wife went back to his grams for prayer meeting. (yay!!) So I'm hoping to go back over perhaps Sunday evening when Steve and Becky go to his grams for evening service. I'll keep you all updated! haha

My second "date" was a flub. The jerk ditched me (again). I should have seen it coming though, he always stands me up. Oh well! Take the bad with the good, right? :P 

Till next time

xo Lisa

Blind Date..

I may or may not have my first official Blind Date tomorrow.
My Pastors wife Becky called  me today and asked if I was seeing anybody steady, when I answered "no" she said she knew of a gentleman that her and her husband have thought for a while I would get along good with. After a while of chatting we decided that tomorrow afternoon we would go for a drive and just pop over to his grandmothers for tea. This gentleman stops by his grandmothers every day at the same time for a cuppa and tomorrow there will be some extra company lol.
I've never done this blind dating thing, so I'm hoping I don't become a blubbering idiot and make a fool of myself. ( I probably will!) Here's hoping that he's cute and we hit it off. Would be kind of fun, right? haha
I will let you all know tomorrow sometime how it went! (I may or may not have another date tomorrow night ;) but I know who this guy is lol)
xo
Lisa

I'm Back (again)

Hello all!! So sorry for being away from the blog for so long, I didn't forget this time, promise, I was just going through some stuff that I didn't want public. Now I've got my life back on track and I'm back again to annoy you all with my posts (haha)
SO! There have been some changes in my life these past few months you all may be interested in knowing about, and then I have a short vent haha. First off, my changes..
Numero 1.. I have eliminated some people from my life. People that were holding me down and keeping me from where I want to be in life. Smell ya later folks!!
Number 2.. I gave online dating an honest try. Went on one date and (I thought) it went well, but I never heard from him again.. guess it didn't go well? :P
Number 3.. I got a tattoo. Yep! I finally grew a set and went to the tattoo parlour and got a small tattoo on my left wrist.

It reads "Yahweh" in Hebrew :) The purpose of me getting this tattoo in this spot was because lately I feel I haven't been the Christian I should be, and I haven't been setting a good example for my sweet little cousin so I put God's name on my wrist because I knew I would see it there every day and it would remind me that I have to live a more Godly life. 

Now on to my vent. I've started to feel like I'm just the "good time" girl that guys will text and want to hang around with when they're single, but I'm not good enough for them to date. Now don't take me saying that to mean I'm a whore or anything, I'm still a virgin. But it seems any guy I'm interested in, will want to be around me and talk to me when there's no other girl in their life, but as soon as they find a girlfriend, I get the cold shoulder. It's getting frustrating. Anyways! haha Sorry for vent, but I needed to get that off my shoulders haha

Until next time 

xo Lisa

The Best Video.. EVER!

Hey all. I just found this video on facebook and I literally laughed so hard I thought I was going to pee my pants. Its THAT funny! Not even joking. No exaggeration even! My stomach still burns from laughing so hard. I swear to you all, you HAVE to see it!!
SO! Without further adieu, here is the link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KAQhG59zqZc
Watch, laugh (please pee first!), enjoy, share, watch again. :)
xo
Lisa

Compassion

I should never go on the compassion website. It makes me want to sponsor more little ones. I already sponsor 2 little boys Joel and Loukmane, and have a third boy, my correspondent child, Robert, but looking at the hundreds of children who need sponsors just tears my heart into bits.

This morning I was on the compassion.com site, and I came across this little boy named Jorge from Ecuador.  His profile said he was crippled in one arm, but he still had the most beautiful smile on his face! I wish I could sponsor him so bad! But I'm confident that with that darling smile on his face he is going to get a wonderful sponsor! If somebody out there in the blog-o-sphere is thinking about sponsoring a child, I hope you'll take a look at Jorge. He's 6 years old and his birthday is in just 2 days!! Wouldn't that be a wonderful birthday present for this precious little boy? Here is the link to sponsor Jorge http://www.compassion.com/sponsor_a_child/child-biography.htm?needKey=EC5930350
Please take a look and I hope you'll make the decision to sponsor a child today, whether it is Jorge or another little one, I know some little one out there will love you forever for your decision to sponsor them! If you can't financially sponsor a child, Compassion has a great correspondence program! Its definitely a win-win situation. You don't have to put out financially if you can't afford it, AND you get ALL the letters!! :) 

All for now everybody :) I'll post again soon!

xo Lisa

Stupid Idea? Love.

So, tonight, I did something stupid. I added my brother to my facebook. Except he doesn't know it's me because I used my old account with my fake name. (Well, if he reads this, he knows now..) I only added him really because I can never remember if his birthday is on the 17th 18th or 19th. I was pretty sure it was the 18th, but to be sure, I added him. As I 'stalked' him a little tonight, I happened upon pictures of my nieces, who I'm not allowed to talk to. I was hurting already from the stupidness of not being allowed to communicate with them, and looking at their pictures sure as hell didn't help my pain any. In fact, it only made it hurt worse. I want so badly to resolve things between my brother and I (I'm not ready to make nice with Cindy yet..) so I can talk to my nieces, but I'm still so mad at him. I get soo frustrated when I remember what he told me and what he did to me, but when I look at Madison and Amanda, I want to get to know them, and the strength of my love for them overcomes the anger I feel towards my brother. I'm lost for what I should do. I know the Bible says to forgive, and I have, but I just haven't told him that yet. If only there were some way I could talk to my girls without their parents knowing, even if it were just long enough to tell them how much their Grampie and I love them, no matter what their parents say. Because if Cindy had her way, the girls would hate me. The thought of that crushes my soul. I don't know what I would do if the girls hated me, its hard enough to know that they are being told that I hate them and that there is nothing I can do about it.
I just need them to know how much I love them, and that no matter what, I always will.

One Cruel Joke

So, for the last two months-ish, my brother and his girlfriend have been playing one horribly cruel joke on me, and I felt I had to blog about it to "get it off my chest" per say. Around November 22nd ish, John's girlfriend, Cindy, messaged me bitching about me consoling what I believed to be my brother's broken heart. He was upset (or so I thought) and had said she was gay, and Cindy thought that I believed she was. So she decided I wouldn't be allowed to be a part of the twin's lives anymore (the twins being my nieces.) and nor could my father, and she proceeded to speak cruel words about my father. I replied and tried to be gentle in my words, in hopes that whatever I had said or done to vex her would be forgiven. It didn't happen. We fought for a few days, her with nasty words, me with gentle words and ending with God Bless you, trying to soften her heart a little. Eventually I became angry and vexed at her myself and threatened to make sure all dad's friends could see the words she had written about him, and had their chance to say cruel things about her. I never followed through with my threat because I didn't want to become like her. She then blocked me, from her profile as well as her childrens accounts, which made me heartbroken to know that I couldn't talk to my nieces whenever I chose.
I continued to talk to my brother through this, and we had our fights, and on Wednesday, he deleted me as a friend on facebook, after I confronted him about his relationship status as being "It's complicated" and he responded with he was only looking for sex. When I growled at him for deleting me, he told me to relax, that this whole thing was just a joke, and that he and Cindy were just peachy.
That hurt me deep. I couldn't, and still can't, understand why someone would do that, and how they found that process funny, when I had to suffer so badly.
Tonight I confronted my brother about the matter, but he has yet to respond. TOmorrow I will go after Cindy, as I feel I deserve and explanation for all this nonsense.

Friday Night Joys

I'm enjoying my Friday night, and thought I would blog a little about it :D I am sitting here in my pastors (very comfy) chair, listening to some beautiful accordion playing by my friend Steffen, listening to his girlfriend Chelsea and my pastor Ian sing along, and just generally enjoying my night :D soon we will switch to the kitchen and enjoy some good food and good fellowship with friends, then we will retire back to the living room, or the "comfy chairs".
I love my "Friday Night Crew" we really are a special bunch. Friday nights for me are now full of laughter and joy for me =) what I did without my friends before, I don't know. But I know I will never trade these wonderful people for the WORLD! I love them all dearly <3